Ikigai + Abiding
‘I was again absorbed in writing Ikigai at night. As I was overflowing with ideas, I played quiet pieces on the piano for one hour partly to make my children fall asleep and partly to calm myself. What a moving experience it is that I can use all my past experiences and studies to create a unified whole through my writing!’ - Mieko Kamiya
How do you let go?
I know that holding on to all that you've learnt and all that you've got, feels safe. Feels familiar. Even important. I also hang onto these things for dear life, because it's the only life I know. I too hide behind victimhood and the story I think I've been served. I get tired sometimes thinking the challenge is too heavy to look for the light. But here's the thing…
We have to let go.
Let go of the excess.
Without the additional baggage to drag through each day, you can begin to simplify.
Simplicity leads to an intentional promotion of the things we value the most.
Not a Marie Kondo style minimalism.
But less of the heavy lifting of the old patterns and previous pain.
So you can abide in the present.
Resting in your true nature.
We let go, to remember who we are.
And that is Ikigai. Not an external, all-validating purpose. But a gentle remembering of who we are and what we want from this life. So there can be a “unified whole” in everything we do.
Letting go is really hard for most of us, because it's not something we can work at, or try harder to accomplish. It's true surrender. And often we become aware of what we need to let go of, but then we intellectualise and analyse, attempting to solve what's holding us back. But letting go doesn't work like that. It's a natural experience in our body, often blocked by our brains. Just like sleep. It cannot be an effort, it must be as simple as picking up a ball, and dropping it at our feet.
I am in the thick of this right now. I've spent years building awareness of the desires of my soul, connecting to my self, but my brain still gets in the way of my body. And I don't let go. Not really. Which means I carry outdated patterns into adulthood, and ultimately I am rarely present.
This leads to tension in my body (jaw, stomach, hips), an over-reliance on what others think and an inability to just drop it and rest in the joy, peace and love that richly abides in my life.
All of this interferes with being in the flow of Ikigai.
So what am I doing - or should I say undoing - to let this go…
What am I “doing” to let go?
Practice looking to the light. Rather than focusing on what needs releasing and wondering how to begin, I intentionally fill my days with simple delights that start to slow me and show me how to live from a centre of abiding.
Declutter. Physically I have found power in letting go of too much stuff. Mentally I am increasingly protective of what I let into my thoughts and soul.
Loving movement and deep, slow breaths. Ideally not a strict structure of your well practiced yoga routine or regular meditation, but something freer, more natural to how you feel you want to move that day.
Number 3 is where we start to create conditions for the body to let go, the transforming experience of affect. If you are feeling misaligned, burnt out or just a little bit off, this somatic approach is a powerful place to start. I do not have all the answers, but I'd love to hold the space for you to start releasing and re-connecting to your Ikigai. If you'd like to know more, reply “Ikigai”.
